Remember the swatches from a few weeks ago? Well, they have turned into a learning experience.
Since so many of you voted for April Mist, Custard and Ballet Slipper Pink we got samples of all three. These were quite simply... a comical disaster. We decided that April Mist looked like Turquoise, Custard like Lemon Meringue, and Ballet Slipper Pink like Calamine Lotion... We laughed it off; thinking that the next day we would find samples of milder versions of the pink and blue.
Well... to make a long story short we now have 12 different colors on the wall; and while we are no further along in the decision process, I have learned a serious lesson in patience.
I've found in this season of expectation that it is quite tempting to be full of silly "expectations". Our culture would like me to believe that I "need" this and must accomplish A, B & C by the baby's arrival. But truly, does Beatrice "need" a nursery dressed to the nines? Do I "need" a boppy, a bumbo, a bouncer, and a bottle cleaner?
In these past weeks I found myself drifting away from the Spirit given joy that Beatrice has brought to our lives and wandering into a world full of anxiety and fear over that which "must" be done. Which is most likely the reason I haven't felt the motivation to write. The condition of my heart has been simply, yucky.
I so desire to return to a place where I am thoughtfully preparing for the arrival of my precious little one. Not only in the accumulation of things, but in the careful preparation of my heart. Where each addition to her nursery discovered at a yard sale is a cause for rejoicing, not a check mark on a to-do list. Where each day is savored for all that it is.
So dear friends, Bea may have a kaleidoscope of a nursery and the Barnes household may not have every "needed" baby item, but there WILL be joy, and joy abundantly!
I have been singing this song to my sweet girl recently, yet it has been more of a reminder to me, her mommy, of the infinite love my Savior holds for me. May it encourage your heart today.
Monday, June 28, 2010
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This is a beautiful reminder lauren... what wonderful mothering you are already giving miss Bea!
ReplyDeleteWhat an important lesson to learn this early in the journey! The Holy Spirit is so good to teach us these lessons. I can't remember where I heard it first, but someone said that the definitely of frustration is just "un-met expectations". I have found myself thinking of this in so many situations...once I'm reminded of it, somehow it seems to diffuse the frustration. Every one of our pregnancy, birthing, mothering, and life experiences are so different (which makes them all the more beautiful), but learning that lesson early one has allowed me to "let myself off the hook" probably a hundred times when it comes to being "the perfect mom" that I so want to be. It's been a hard lesson for me to CONTINUE to learn, but a very valuable one! Happy color hunting:)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful song. Wise lesson. Love you and baby B. What a nurturing home she'll be born into....walls painted or not. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you dear ladies.
ReplyDeleteWhat a perfect post. It totally sums up that anxiety you start to feel. Things don't make a home it's the love that fills it.
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